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This Week on TV (9/13-9/19)


(Make sure to check out TV Envy’s Programming Schedule.)

 

MONDAY (9/13)

Season premieres: 90210, Gossip Girl, The Nate Berkus Show, Oprah

  • 90210 (CW, 8 p.m.):  Season premiere. “A deadly earthquake strikes Beverly Hills.” This explains what happened to the Peach Pit.
  • Little People, Big World (TLC, 8:30 p.m.):  “Matt and Zach embark on a father-son road trip in an attempt to mend their broken relationship.” A reconciliation is as likely as the show being renewed.
  • Hoarders (A&E, 9 p.m.):  “A woman’s home is caving in from the weight of garbage piled up to the ceiling.” The good news? The cave-in created additional storage space underneath the house.

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This Week on TV (7/19-7/25)


 

MONDAY (7/19)
  • Behind the Music (VH1, 8pm):  “ is profiled through interviews and archival clips. The R&B star discusses his relationship with TLC’s Chilli.” I’d hate to say things are still “chilly” between them, but…
  • Rizzoli & Isles (TNT, 10pm):  “Jane clashes with her new boss (Donnie Wahlberg).” You have to hang tough with that guy.
  • True Beauty (ABC, 10pm):  Season finale. “The three beauties left are paired with celebrities to party the night away. They then don’t get to sleep it off, but instead must film a commercial about Las Vegas. One player folds like a house of cards from the sleep deprivation.” Beauty sleep is for suckers who can’t afford plastic surgery.

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This Week on TV (5/17-5/23)


(Make sure to check out TV Envy’s Programming Schedule.)

 

MONDAY (5/17)
  • 10 Things I Hate About You (ABC Family, 8pm):  “Joey gets a callback for a reality show!” Canceled shows call for desperate measures.
  • Romantically Challenged (ABC, 9:30pm):  “Perry takes a stay-at-home vacation, which irritates unemployed roommate Shawn so much that Shawn is willing to take a job - virtually any job.” This is what Perry would call a ‘productive vacation.’
  • The Real Housewives of New Jersey (Bravo, 10pm):  “Sick of the Jersey-girl superdramas, Dina reaches out to a Zen master to remove all the negativity from her life.” In different parts of Jersey, problem-solving “Zen masters” go by a different title.

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This Week on TV (3/15-3/21)


Make sure to check out TV Envy’s Programming Schedule.)

 

MONDAY (3/15)
  • Chuck (NBC, 8pm):  When Casey (Adam Baldwin) sets out on a side mission for his former commander, he lands in jail for treason. Cut to Chuck and Sarah, who try to break him out of prison and restore his good name.” They have to convince everyone he’s not one of those Baldwin brothers once and for all.
  • Gossip Girl (CW, 9pm):  “Chuck discovers some things about the woman who may be his mother (Laura Harring).” He came across a steamy video of her with Naomi Watts taken somewhere near Mulholland Drive.
  • Damages (FX, 10pm):  “Arthur Frobisher (Ted Danson) returns to launch his new foundation.” As a member of the Handsome Men’s Club, he hopes to support up-and-coming hunks.

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This Week on TV (8/24-8/30)

The Rachel Zoe Project

(To get a look at TV Envy’s 2009 Fall Programming Schedule, click here.)

 

MONDAY (8/24)
  • Dating in the Dark (ABC, 9pm):  Season finale. “In the first season closer, an ex-FBI profiler assists the contestants.” Let’s hope proper background checks were part of his services.
  • The Rachel Zoe Project (Bravo, 10pm):  Season premiere. “Season 2 opens with celeb stylist and her mod squad assigned to dress up five actresses for the Golden Globe awards. Meanwhile, a slumping economy affects the rich and famous when the production of couture gowns drops.” In other news: Us Weekly will devote an entire issue to dresses worn twice.
  • Hoarding (A&E, 10pm):  “A woman whose children were removed from her home because of her hoarding wants to clean her home so that her children can return.” Until then, she’ll manage with the few children she kept hidden underneath the clothes.
  • Nurse Jackie (Showtime, 10:30pm):  “The movie reviewer awakens from his coma to find that his critical senses have been radically altered.” Fortunately, his ability to sniff out crap was insured by Lloyd’s of London.

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