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Sunday August 1, 2010 9:01 am

This Week on TV (8/2-8/8)

MONDAY (8/2)
  • The Bachelorette (ABC, 8pm):  Season finale. “Ali arrives in Bora Bora with two guys (Chris L. and Roberto) and one rose. Her family are also there—-and they do her no favor by liking both bachelors equally.” Her family said it was so hard to choose in this loser-loser situation.
  • The Good Guys (FOX, 9pm):  “A crime family dispatches an assassin to kill a man in the Witness Protection Program after Dan accidentally exposes the man’s identity.” He forgot to adjust his privacy settings to “Friends Only.”
  • The Closer (TNT, 9pm):  “Provenza stumbles into a compromising situation, as is his habit, when he romances a flight attendant on company time—-then discovers a dead body in her condominium.” It was too big to stuff into the overhead compartment.
  • 18 to Life (CW, 8pm):  Series premiere. “Tom and Jessie shock their families by revealing they’re engaged in the debut of this sitcom, which follows a pair of 18-year-olds who tie the knot.” Compared to , this is a comedy.
  • Shaq Vs. (ABC, 9pm):  “Shaquille O’Neal heads to Washington, D.C. to square off with National Spelling Bee champion Kavya Shivashankar.” Spoiler: One will be immediately eliminated during the “Spell Each Other’s Names” round.
  • The Rachel Zoe Project (Bravo, 10pm):  Season premiere. “The aftermath of Taylor’s firing leaves the Zoe crew reeling in the Season 3 opener.” Despite repeating the phrase “I Die,” no one knew the panicked Rachel was serious.


  • Confessions: Animal Hoarding (Animal, 9pm):  “Divorce looms for a couple whose home is filled with animals and clutter.” Once the animals are removed, they’ll have no one else to yell at for the mess.
  • Monsters Inside Me (Animal, 10pm):  “Tests reveal that a girl’s stomach cramps are symptoms of a parasitic infestation.” That’s one symptom Midol Complete doesn’t relieve.
  • Shark Bites: Adventures in Shark Week (Discovery, 10pm): “Late Late Show host goes diving with sharks in the Bahamas.” His experience in late night television should serve him well.


  • Bethenny Gets Married? (Bravo, 10pm):  Season finale. “Season 1 ends with fellow New York City wife helping to plan an official baby shower for Bethenny.” The party wasn’t going to be co-ed, but Simon insisted on coming.
  • NICU (Disc. Health, 10pm):  “A woman carrying triplets gives birth early.” It’ll be the last time anyone in that family arrives anywhere early.
  • Futurama (Comedy, 10pm):  “Earth is overrun by a race of intelligent felines.” And the problem is…?


FRIDAY (8/6)
  • Wife Swap (ABC, 8pm):  “A driven, conservative family of gymnasts swap with a freewheeling family that enjoy kickball and karaoke.” Kickball + gymnastics = a rhythmic gymnastics event worth watching.
  • Whale Wars (Animal, 9pm):  “The Sea Shepherds find themselves surrounded by four whalers and soon one of the vessels crashes into them.” I’m not even sure Progressive will cover that one.
  • Flashpoint (CBS, 10pm):  “A female kidnapper () abducts two girls.” Welcome to the O.C., bitches!


SUNDAY (8/8)
  • Food Network Challenge (Food, 8pm):  “ cakes are created to celebrate the 10th anniversary of the popular children’s show.” Unfortunately, Swiper swiped the creations before anyone could enjoy them.
  • Entourage (HBO, 10:30pm):  “The return of Billy Walsh draws mixed reactions from the guys.” Mixed reactions from the viewers as well.
  • My Boys (TBS, 10pm):  “Brendan’s on-the-go younger girlfriend exhausts him.” The relationship would be less tiring if she stopped running away from him.



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