On with our sweeps spoiler extravaganza: Desperate Housewives. Just what will these madcap ladies be up to next? Find out after the jump.

Susan learns the identity of her biological father, meets him…and is rejected by him in the same episode.

Matt and Danielle’s ‘secret’ relationship is exposed.

Bree FINALLY learns what George is really up to.

Carlos gets paroled.

Andrew is back to cause more trouble, that scamp.