Forget it, ladies! Find a man who already has the qualities you are looking for. Now, I am not saying that if you are both young and he is still getting an education and will be moving up in his career that you should not be with him. I am talking about situations like he is forty and still living with his parents or has room mates and smokes pot all day; when he’s still trying at fifty to get that record deal while he expects you to support him, well, you get the idea. If you are fine with those scenarios or something similar, then that is alright, but if not, move on to someone who already has something going on. Don’t think that with your encouragement or advice that he will change into what you want him to be. So many women are so eager to fall in love and get married that they give a guy credit for qualities that he doesn’t have and won’t ever develop. Don’t fall for a guy until you know all that you need to about him. You want a man with good character and the qualities that are important to you now, not possibly one day.

Don’t commit to or marry a guy if:

* He is jealous and it has been an issue in his past relationships.
* He abuses drugs or alcohol. An addict will always give priority to his addiction. You cannot save him or change that; the desire to change has to come from within him.
* He is gay and you think that you can change him.
* He tries to isolate you and makes you give up your friends and activities that you enjoy.
* He makes fun of you or tells you that you are stupid.