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Saturday April 23, 2011 3:41 am

American Idol 10: Top 7 Results

American Idol’s Thursday results show opened with an epic montage of the judges (Steven Tyler, Jennifer Lopez, Randy Jackson) falling over themselves to praise this year’s contestants. The clip ended with J-Lo crying “anybody could win!”

That’s the show’s current angle: there are no standouts, because all the singers as so sensational. It’s patently untrue, of course. Scotty McCreery has dominated his fellow contestants in Twitter followers all season long, and James Durbin is constantly singled out as the group’s best in the press.

 

More than 52 million votes were cast for the Top 7 following Wednesday’s performance round. The group was quickly trotted out on stage and banished; no big group number this week. Instead, Lauren, Haley, Stefano and Jacob formed a quartet to perform an absolutely horrific rendition of “Hey, Soul Sister.” Jacob Lusk drowned out Stefano Langone when they sang together, Haley Reinhart was lost completely and when all four sang it was downright painful. The entire atrocity is viewable in the top video.

The week’s Ford music video, set to “World,” had a message that we absolutely didn’t get. See if you can figure it out when you  check it out at Albumista.

Before any results were read, more singing. Casey, Scotty and James teamed up to perform “Viva La Vita.” Each sounded good during the solos, but every harmony was horrible. Watch the video above the see the entire train wreck.

Things got a bit more serious when Ryan Seacrest asked Casey Abrams, then Jacob Lusk, to stand up. Neither was moved to center stage. Casey was quickly deemed safe, and he sat back down after an emphatic fist pump. Jacob was not so lucky; he was set to the other side of the stage to sit in one of the bottom three seats. But additional results would have to wait.

David Cook -- Idol winner -- returned home to debut his brand-new single “The Last Good-Bye.” Cook’s strong performance took the show right back to season 7. Watch the entire thing in the video above.

Lauren, James and Stefano were brought to the center of the stage when the show returned. It was Stefano Langone who was sent to join Lusk in the bottom three, to a chorus of boos from the in-house crowd. James and Lauren were rushed off to safety after a downtrodden Langone walked away.

Scotty and Haley were brought forward to learn their fate next. Scotty had the unfortunate starting position of the performance night, and won few accolades from the judges after his performance. Haley was simply boring, as always, and won immense praise from the judges. Scotty McCreery was (predictably) declared safe, and frequent bottom three dweller Haley was moved to the other side of the stage.

As soon as she was seated, Ryan Seacrest pulled her out of her stool and sent her right back to safety, leaving Lusk and Langone to stew in fear.

But before the final result was read, Katy Perry delivered and epic stage show for “E.T.” There were lasers. There were dancers in crazy costumes. There was smoke. You’ll have to watch the video to get the full effect.

Once the stage was cleared, and Jacob stood shoulder-to-shoulder with Stefano, another contender was sent home. Stefano Langone bore his elimination with a smile, while on the sidelines James Durbin cradled his head in his hands in abject misery. The two have been roommates for the duration of the show. It’s actually Langone’s second elimination -- he was a judges’ wildcard pick.

Langone told Seacrest he’s “blessed” because Idol has “started his career.” Yeah keep dreaming, kid. To close the show, Stefano performed “Lately,” and if you keep watching the show in successive seasons maybe you will see his face again. Otherwise… well, you’ve still got 6 Idols to love.

And they’ll return to the stage next week so that another one of them can be kicked to the curb. Keep track of all the action when you read our American Idol 10 posts.

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