Gamers of a certain age, if given half a chance, will gladly recount grand tales of smoky rooms, dimly lit by a few dozen cathode rays where the only sounds are the white noise of competing digitized soundtracks, crude speech sythesizers, blips and bells, pings and whistles and artificial arpeggios rolling down an electronic scale.
The misty sincerity of those gamers who cut their teeth on the quarter-munching cabinets of Space Invaders, Asteroids, Missile Command and Sinistar is almost enough to make one forget what a mess the modern arcade equivalent has become. The gargantuan interface machines with their elaborate weapon approximations and physical demands juxtapose over a likewise spectacular price per play resulting in a hollow shell of what the old guard knew so well. These are not arcades as exist in those guarded memories, they are interactive entertainment experiences: The kind of branded, marginalized speciality device that has been focus tested and trade-show marketed to get the premium floor space right out front in view of the mall concourse is showpiece here.
Even those arcade machines which can still accurately be described as video games compete for the higher-yield ticket-generating skill games (which ironically involve very little skill). Most of those who recall the days when 3D graphics referred to the vector lines of Tempest pass by these modern emporiums. Perhaps they shake their heads a little or make a disparaging comment. Kids these days. Get off my lawn. They don’t enter; inside is only heartbreak.
Perhaps what hurts the most is that it is a heartbreak we chose. We have no one to blame but ourselves, for while the arcade as it was may be dead, ultimately it is us who killed it.
We wanted the more valuable entertainment experience. We asked for and then demanded a perfect replica of our arcade favorites that we could play at home from the comfort of our couches. We pressed for more arcade-quality graphics on our home consoles until our set top boxes had visuals that outpaced anything showcased on a standalone machine. We asked for, and received, greater narrative depth in our games and as a casualty for our insistence we killed the arcade—the very entity we now mourn.
Whether you love, loathe or simply don’t get Dance Dance Revolution and its brethren, we think you’ll find this item as zany and amusing as we do. It’s the USB Dance Mat, which plugs into your computer and allows you to play DDR—with your fingers. The mat’s arrows light up randomly to the beat (a soundtrack is included), which your fingers “dance” to. The longer you last, the faster the music. It even comes with a cut-out dancer to fit over your fingers, for added silliness. You can choose a 30 or 60 second game, and there’s even a counter to track your moves. We would definitely hold mini-DDR competitions in our cubicle, if it weren’t for that whole pink slip thing. Available for $18 USD.
What do you get if you combine DDR and a Piano? Piano Wizard! The Piano Wizard teaches basic music notation and piano playing skills in a somewhat childish interface. Don’t get me wrong - it sounds like a great idea for kids, but the company seems to be marketing it at ages 4-40, and I’m not so so sure if it will succeed in the teen and up market.
Check out the video for it’s DDR-tastic interface, and some hot MIDI love.
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